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Can Criticism Ever Be Constructive?

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Constructive Criticism... How many times you must have heard these two words in your life. Every criticizer will finally use these two words after he or she has offended somebody by saying "It was actually constructive criticism"... Absolute lie. Never believe that for a second. There is no such thing in logic as constructive criticism". It is an Oxy-Moron. An absolute opposite in meaning. Criticism can never be constructive. One word is absolutely negative and one is positive. Suggestions can be constructive and helpful. Advice can be encouraging and positive. Constructive criticism is like so many other words in english language when put together have no logical meaning, like "Act Naturally", You can not act naturally because either you act or be natural. Or like "Honest Mistake"... No. It could only be a mistake which is either intentional or unintentional... A mistake can never be honest. You can only accept your mistake honestly. Long debate over linguistic mistakes of english language to hide our intentions behind words... Back to the topic of how not letting yourself be affected by criticism...

If you want to train yourself not to be affected by criticism.. Train your mind never to be excited over praise as well. It is that simple. When you train yourself to be detach from the pleasures and expectations, you will become able not to be affected by verbal hurdles of people who are getting in your way. The easiest thing in life is to make a comment and call it constructive criticism. It takes only verbal effort. To guide someone or to suggest someone or to advise someone, one needs to evaluate the situation the other person is in, have some experience on the subject, understand human psychology to the point where you feel what the other person is going through, to have total command of the language in which you will be advising that person so he does not take it in the emotionally discouraging manner..and many other things you need, which means that before you do for others one has to be able to have done for himself first. In order to give advise to others, one needs to have so many thoughts and considerations within his mind and an absolute command over the subject that your words are beneficial to the person on the receiving end. And that rarely happens.

And always remember that no matter how good of a person you are, there will be people who will dislike you or even hate you. When a political candidate wins even with an absolute majority, which means with 51% minimum, It means that 49% of the people disliked him and did not vote for him. People's taunts, negativity, discouraging words etc should make you more determined because the way life goes, the same people who are discouraging you today will be praising you tomorrow. Neither look for their praise nor be affected by their discouragement. yes, have friends who guide you, encourage you, Stop you from making a wrong decision if you are confused, but more often than not, you will find it very difficult to find such people because people will camouflage their dislike for you by calling their opinions, constructive . Human behaviour is such a beautiful subject that once you start to get some command over it, you can see through people without even them knowing that you are more aware of them than they are of themselves because of the words they use, body language they have, gestures they make, Words they use and in which preference the words are used in sequential manner. The most important creation of Allah according to himself is the human mind, he praises it the most in Quran. The second word that is used the most in relation to human mind in Quran is ILM (Knowledge) used over 700 times. So the combination of increasing your ILM of human mind will take you to your destination in life, whatever it may be. The only painful thing will be that you will be noticing the veils coming off from the people around you. Mola Ali A.S. once said "Agar Tum Log Ek Doosray Ke Khiyalaat Parhna Seekh Lo Tau Ek Doosray Ko Kafan Tak Na Do"...

So before you study anything else, study how to understand yourself. Understanding yourself will make you understand others, and understanding others will make you into a better person.


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